I've had many old friends that haven't seen me in a while ask me, "where's the curly hair"? I started straightening my hair every day about 2 years ago. I recently got a hair cut and my stylist said the cut would look cute curly too. So I thought I would try it. She was right it was cute but something bothered me all day at work. It wasn't the comments from co-workers because they said it was really cute. It was when I saw myself in the mirror. I didn't see the person who felt confident and whose lost 70lbs. It wasn't the person I saw before I lost all the weight because I always saw myself as thin. It was for the first time I saw myself as everyone else saw me before I lost the weight. I couldn't stand to look at myself in the mirror. The image of me in this picture would flash in my mind as I stood looking in the mirror. Why? Why am I having an issue with my hair being curly? I think it's because I see the old me and the old me was always over weight and unhappy. My straight hair makes me feel skinny, pretty and sexy. For the first time in my life I'm getting positive attention but I don't get that if my hair is curly or at least that's how I felt. I've got to learn that's not the case anymore. The truth is I'm blessed. It's that simple! Curly or Not!

October has been a successful month. I set out to lose 5 lbs and I did it. That makes a total of 70lbs. Wow! I also ran a 5k with the goal to complete it with out stopping. I did it and broke my record by 4 minutes. It felt great!

November starts the Holiday season along with my birthday and anniversary. It can be very temping but I have faith that I can lose 5 lbs by the end of the month and complete another 5k on Thanksgiving day. You see I have these dark brown pants that I bought one size too small. My goal is not only to put them on but to be comfortable in them as well. No muffin top in these pants. I want to be able to breath easy.

I've also committed to do a half marathon in May 2010. I'm going to start training with my friend in December and enter a couple of 10k's between now and then. This is a big goal that's going to take lots of focus and discipline. I also want to go on a cruise with my family so I want to have reached by final weight loss goal by then. With 40lbs to go, we will see what happens. Mean while I'll keep my focus on my November goal.

The Race

If you haven't noticed yet I'm a goal oriented person. Once I complete a goal I strive for the next. I may have several goals at one time. One of my goals this year was to do two 5k races. I had done the first race this past spring and completed it in 36 minutes. I was proud of my time but this time I was not focusing on speed. The focus was to complete the race without stopping to walk. I've been training by jogging in my neighbor hood 3-4 days a week about 2.5 miles without stopping. I'm ready to see how far I can push myself.

I was a little nervous this week because I was jogging a with a friend that I had never jogged with before. I don't usually jog with anyone and I didn't want to hold her back to my pace. She assured me that would not be the case. She just wanted to run the race with me.

Race day! It was a perfect morning for a race. The temperature outside was 55-60 degrees. I had a great support team at the race. My husband, two kids and my mother were there to cheer me on. We met up with my friend and stretched before it begun. I told her if she wanted to run ahead she could. I would meet her at the finish line. But again she said she was there to race with me. The first mile we jogged under 10 minutes. I knew I was going to fast and I needed to slow down if I was going to last. The next mile was a struggle with a huge hill at the beginning of the mile. Mile 2 was at a steady pace and we completed it in 10 minutes 33 seconds. The last mile was going to be a challenge because I knew we had to go back over that huge hill. We got to the hill with about 1/2 mile left. This time we were going up the hill a different route. It was not a easier route either but I knew I could do it. The water station was at the top so that's what I focused on. By the time I made it to the top I had given all that I could have given. I did it! I got a drink and got a second breath. I could see the finish line. As we rounded the corner to the home stretch I knew I had succeeded my goal. I didn't want to get emotional but I was. I told my friend as we crossed the goal line that she helped me not only complete my goal but that I had bet my time by 4 minutes.

This was the first time I felt the emotions of the past year. It felt so great but I wasn't going to let anyone see it. Even now as I'm writing this blog I get a little teary eyed. Now I know I can do this and I'm setting my standards higher. My next 5k is the Turkey Trot on Thanksgiving day. Stay tuned!

My experiment in July proved to be the answer to jump starting my weight loss again. August was a good motivating month for me too. I had been saving money to go shopping. For the first time in almost 20 years I could wear regular clothes. I was able to shop at regular stores. I did not have to buy plus size clothes. This was an emotional experience for me. I was actually enjoying shopping again. Before I would get so depressed when I shopped for me that it just lead to more eating. This time it was different. It felt like a huge bolder had been lifted off me.

The month did not end with just the excitement of new clothes. It ended with a long time goal met. Yes, I did it! The last day of the month and I weighed in at 199.1 lbs. I yelled down the stairs to my husband. "Honey...Honey...I did it." He was really proud of me. I don't ever want to go back to the 200's again.

September was equally as good. I stayed below 200 lbs and even got as low as 197.1 lbs. I worked on train for a 5k the first weekend of October. My goal for the end of October is to be at 195 lbs. Let's see if I can do it.

One goal day one is the first day of this blog about my journey to lose 110 lbs and keep it off. Before the journey begins here's my disclaimer. I'm not a writer and my grammar is horrible. I just want to tell my story in my own words. Regardless of the poor writing skills. The purpose is to give back what I have gained, confidence.

My journey started with weighing in at 263 lbs over 2 years ago. My life at that time was a mess and on a road that I did not want to be on. I had sleep apnea, along with sleep issues and depression. My body, heart and mind ached everyday until I decided no medication, weight program, or anyone else could fix this for me. It was all up to only one person, ME. How can I do this on my own? The answer....One day at a time.

I had tried Weight Watchers for 6 months and lost 25 lbs. I was able to get off all medications. My sleep apnea was gone along with my sleeping issues. I felt really good about myself. Specially when people would notice me in a positive way. I never had people notice me in such a positive way before. Unfortunately this feeling was short lived. I hit a plateau and did not know how to deal with it. So what did I do? I gave up and gained back all but 6 lbs back. Now my weight was 257 lbs. I was use to giving up. I had done it many times in my life. Now I was giving up on getting healthy and happy.

Six months later I was able to gain back some determination to try again but I knew I had to be smarter this time. I got help from a counselor for my emotional issues. I was also finally ready to rethink about how to lose the weight and be successful. If I could not control my food even with a program as easy as Weight Watchers then I need to tackle this another way. So I tried exercise, it was something I really did not like to do but after I did it I felt great. I talked myself into walking on the treadmill for 15 minutes. I thought it was a start and it gave me some confidence to do more. I got bored with the treadmill very quickly. I thought I wonder if I could jog? I had never in my life jogged before but I felt I could at least try it. So I remember a friend that's was a personal trainer tell me to try to walk/jog. Humm, walk/jog? walk one minute and jog one minute for as long as you can. December 2007, I started walk/jogging for 20 minutes, 1-2 days a week. I knew I need some additional help and encouragement. So I called my friend and ask if she could come to my house one day a week and train me. That's really when I started to feel I could possibly do this.

I trained 1-2 days a week slowly increasing my speed and time jogging. I was now walking at 3.2 speed and jogging at 4.0 speed for 20 minutes. I had lost about 10-15 lbs in 6 months. I thought that was good but wanted to be better. It was July 13, 2008 and I had hit a plateau and I still could not get my food under control. My friend taught me that when this happens not to get discouraged but to change my route. I've learned that the true definition of plateau is change. So I changed my walk/jog to 2-3 days a week and increase the time to 30 minutes. I started to walk one minute and jog 2-3 minutes. It was also easier for me to wake up early to get my cardo in and lift weight with my friend one day a week after work. The change worked the pounds starting melting off. I was losing 5-7 lbs a month.

Then here came the holidays. I had built confidence in myself that I had never had before. I was determined not to gain the common 5 pounds during the holidays like the average person does. Nope I was not going to gain weight and I was determined to continue to lose it. I joined a competition at work to help employees not again weight over the holidays. If you did not gain weight over the holidays your name would get in a drawing for a Wii and Wii fit.

People really started to notice my weight loss again. I can't explain what encouragement it gave me to keep going. I made it through the holidays and lost almost 15 lbs. I was weighing in around 240-238 lbs. I thought "Hey, I can really do this." But the challenges were not over.

One Goal Day Two

The challenges were both emotional and physical. January 2009, I had been working hard at work, at home with my family and on my weight loss all fall. I was tired and stressed from home and work life. I wasn't losing weight like I had in the last several months I knew it was time to face the food issue. I had made some changes but not enough to make a total life change. I looking at what Weight Watcher had taught me just a year ago, portion control. Ok, let's put this to the test for real this time. I also started a pilot program at work. It was basically teaching how naturally slim people eat and how they control their food. Like all weight loss plans you have to adjust to what results work for you, in my option. With the pilot program I had to write down everything I ate and how much I ate. But I also learned how to read labels and how to really taste my food. Can we truly say as Americans that we taste our food?

I know having a family and all the kid activities after work it's hard to do everything. So we have adapted to eating on the run. I'm so guilty for rushing my kids to eat. I've even made them eat everything on their plate. Why because we are busy and that's how I was taught to eat. I had to slow down and read labels. I really learned to taste my food. I did not know that dorito chips really did not taste as good as I thought. Funny thing is that the food that I thought tasted so good, it really isn't. I don't have cravings like I did before. I also learned over the next few weeks that sugar is evil. Just kidding, it's all good in moderation. I know you've heard that before. But it's true! I started look at portion size and sugar. I lost 3-4lbs a month up until the end of March.

March 2009, I had a goal by the end of the month I wanted to lose 3 lbs to make a total of 50 lbs and my weight 213 lbs. That goal was also a promise I had made to my trainer who was getting married the end of March. I had to stop training with her back in October because my husband had gotten laid off work for the second time in 2008. I knew she had taught me enough to do it on my own but I had to prove it to her and myself. The wedding day I weighed in and I had done it. I was so excited about the wedding. I knew she was going to be so proud of me. I was proud of myself. My husband was noticing me and really excited as well. This new confidence and pride was like a new high. My exercise continued and I changed it up every 6-8 weeks.

I was still wearing my old clothes. It wasn't pretty! I had no idea what size I was now. I had someone give me a gift card to go buy a new pair of pants. That was embarrassing to say the least. I went though and I'm glad I did. I went from a size 22-24 women's to a 18-20 women's.

Then April, May and June came and went with no weight loss. I didn't gain any weight but I didn't lose it either. What was going on? Maybe it was my sugar or sodium? What was I doing wrong? What did I change from when I was losing 5-7 lbs a month. Then it hit me...eating out. My husband had gotten a job a Luby's and been out of town for training in the fall. He's now back home and loves for us to come up there to eat. Even though I was eating fish and good veggies. It was the sodium and fat that they use in the restaurant that was hurting me. So I tried an experiment to see if that was my problem. I quit going for two weeks in July and I lost 5lbs the first week and another 3 in week two. I wan't to be under 200 lbs by the end of August 2009. Can I do it?